Encouraging Growth and Tracking Progress

Supporting an autistic child (or teen or adult) is never about trying to “fix” them — it’s about helping them thrive as their authentic selves. That shift in mindset makes all the difference.

When we focus on growth instead of conformity, we open the door to real progress — the kind that builds confidence and resilience, not just compliance.

One of the most powerful things you can do is set realistic, person-centered goals. These should be meaningful for the individual, not just convenient for the adults around them. Maybe your preschooler is working on trying new textures at mealtime. Maybe your teen is aiming to initiate a short conversation with a classmate, or your adult child wants to learn the steps of a new job routine.

Whatever the goal, start small. Break it down into bite-sized steps that feel doable, so success is within reach. And whenever possible, include the autistic person in setting those goals — their voice and input matter deeply.

As your child works toward these goals, positive reinforcement can go a long way. Celebrate effort, not just outcomes. If they try a new word, point to a picture to communicate, or ask for a break with their device, cheer them on.

💡A high-five, extra time doing something they love, or even just your enthusiastic “You did it!” can boost motivation and help them feel seen.

The more specific your praise, the better: “I saw how you used your words to tell me you needed quiet time — that was really helpful. Great job!” This helps connect the action to the positive outcome and builds a sense of agency.

It’s also helpful to track what’s working and what’s changing. Keeping a simple journal or using an app to note daily events — like meltdowns, transitions, breakthroughs, or mood shifts — can make patterns clearer over time. Maybe you discover that following a consistent bedtime routine leads to better sleep, or that your child has fewer sensory meltdowns after using a weighted lap pad.

These insights can guide your approach and give you evidence to celebrate progress, even when it feels slow.

And those milestones, no matter how small? Celebrate them.

  • Put a progress poster on the fridge. Add a star for every win.

  • Let your child help track their own achievements — it can be empowering for them and heartening for you.

Seeing progress laid out visually can remind you that even if some days are hard, things are moving forward.

Growth in autism isn’t always linear. Some skills take time. Some days feel like setbacks. But with love, support, and the right strategies, your child — and your whole family — will continue to move toward a more confident, connected, and joyful place.